Representing yourself in court

Can I represent myself?

Yes. You have the legal right to represent yourself in family court. Many people do – estimates suggest 50-80% of people in family proceedings are litigants in person.

That said, representing yourself is harder than having professional help. Consider carefully whether it’s right for your situation.

When self-representation may work

• The divorce application itself (straightforward)
• Uncontested financial consent orders
• Relatively simple children matters
• Cases where you can communicate reasonably with your ex
• When you’re organised and comfortable with paperwork

When professional help is strongly advised

• Complex financial matters (businesses, multiple properties, pensions)
• Contested final hearings
• Domestic abuse cases (especially cross-examination)
• Cases involving experts (valuers, psychologists)
• If your ex has a solicitor and you don’t
• If you struggle with paperwork or stress

Preparation is everything

As a litigant in person, thorough preparation is your biggest advantage.

Understand the process

Learn what to expect at each stage:

• What forms to file and when
• What happens at each hearing
• What the judge will want to know
• What decisions need to be made

GOV.UK, Resolution, and Advicenow have guides written for litigants in person.

Know the relevant law

You don’t need to be a lawyer, but understand the key principles:

• For finances: the Section 25 factors (needs, resources, standard of living, etc.)
• For children: the welfare checklist (child’s wishes, needs, harm, capability of parents, etc.)

Organise your documents

Keep everything organised:

• Create a file (paper or digital) with all documents
• File documents in chronological order
• Know where everything is
• Label documents clearly
• Have copies of everything

Prepare for hearings

Before any hearing:

• Read all documents again
• Make notes on key points you want to raise
• Prepare any questions you need to ask
• Know what outcome you’re asking for
• Anticipate what the other side might say

At court

Checking in

When you arrive:

• Find the usher and tell them who you are, which case you’re in, and that you’re a litigant in person
• Sign in on the court list
• Wait to be called

Dress and behaviour

• Dress smartly (business attire)
• Turn your phone off
• Stand when the judge enters or leaves
• Address the judge as “Sir” or “Madam”
• Don’t interrupt anyone
• Speak clearly and calmly
• Take notes

Speaking to the judge

When it’s your turn:

• Stand to speak (unless told otherwise)
• Stick to the relevant issues
• Be factual, not emotional
• Don’t criticise the other party unnecessarily
• Answer questions directly
• If you don’t understand something, ask

If you don’t understand

It’s okay to say “I’m sorry, I don’t understand what that means” or “Could you please explain what I need to do?” Judges expect this from litigants in person and will help you understand the process (though they can’t advise you on what to do).

Support available

Personal Support Unit (PSU)

Volunteers at many courts who provide emotional support and practical help. They can:

• Help you find your way around court
• Sit with you while you wait
• Explain what’s happening (though not give legal advice)
• Accompany you into some hearings

Free and confidential: www.thepsu.org

McKenzie friends

A McKenzie friend is someone who sits with you in court to:

• Take notes
• Help you organise papers
• Quietly suggest questions or points

They cannot speak to the court on your behalf (unless the judge specifically grants permission, which is rare).

A McKenzie friend could be a friend, family member, or someone from a support organisation. Some people offer McKenzie friend services professionally (for a fee) – research carefully before using these.

Duty solicitor schemes

Some courts have duty solicitor schemes offering free advice on the day. Ask court staff if this is available.

Online resources

Advicenow (www.advicenow.org.uk) – Free guides written for litigants in person

Resolution (resolution.org.uk) – Resources for litigants in person including top tips and guides

Judiciary guidance – The courts publish guidance for litigants in person

GOV.UK – Procedural guides on forms and processes

Limited legal help

Even if you can’t afford a solicitor for everything, consider:

• A one-off consultation to understand your position
• Help preparing key documents
• Advice before important hearings
• Review of proposed settlements

Common challenges

Dealing with a represented opponent

If your ex has a solicitor and you don’t:

• You’re not at a disadvantage in the judge’s eyes
• The solicitor may try to help proceedings run smoothly
• Don’t feel intimidated – focus on your case
• Don’t agree to anything you don’t understand

Managing emotions

Divorce is emotional. In court, you need to stay calm:

• Focus on facts, not feelings
• Take a breath before responding
• It’s okay to ask for a short break if needed
• Don’t rise to provocation

Understanding legal language

Family court aims to be accessible, but legal terminology still appears. Don’t pretend to understand if you don’t – ask for clarification.

Cross-examination

In contested hearings, you may need to question witnesses (including your ex-partner). This is challenging. If there’s been domestic abuse, special measures can prevent direct cross-examination.

Practical tips

1. Keep copies of everything – the court loses documents sometimes

2. Meet deadlines – late documents may not be accepted

3. Read everything carefully – especially court orders

4. Ask the court office – they can help with procedures (but not legal advice)

5. Don’t contact the judge directly – all communication goes through official channels

6. Be realistic – understand what outcomes are achievable

7. Focus on the future – judges care about solutions, not blame

8. Consider settlement – most cases settle; don’t refuse reasonable offers because you want “your day in court”

After the hearing

• Make sure you understand any orders made
• Get a copy of the order
• Note any deadlines
• Do what the order says – breaching court orders has consequences

If you don’t understand the order, ask the court office to explain or seek legal advice.